No need to non-shorten it

So many people who I love say this, so if that's you, it's cool.  This is just one of those things that I don't like but everyone else does like, so you keep saying it...I'm not even mad. 

THE ONLY REASONS I IMAGINE PEOPLE SAY HUBBY INSTEAD OF HUSBAND:
1.  They think it's easier to say.
2.  It's less formal.
3.  They want to be more original (moriginal) than other people.
4.  Because they want to rhyme it with something.
5.  It's shorter to type out than husband.

REASONS WHY THE ONLY REASONS I IMAGINE PEOPLE SAY HUBBY INSTEAD OF HUSBAND DON'T MAKE ANY SENSE:
1.  It's not easier to say.  They have the same number of syllables. For real.  Just tap it out.
2.  Yeah, it definitely is less formal...but are you SURE that's a good thing?  Slobster (yeah, you're welcome) is also less formal, and conjures up a lot of the same images in my mind that "hubby" does. 

"Hey, I'm Gina, and this is my slobster, Tadd."  See?  You do not want to say shiz like that.

3.  Let me just be the one to let everyone know that it is not more original than husband.   

I'm so sorry you guys.

4.  Yes, I do see that it's easier to "hubby" than it is to rhyme "husband," but again, people, why are we worried about rhyming things?  No one's husband wants (like really, really WANTS, not like "sure babe, I want that, definitely) a rhyming nickname.  Hubby Bubby...shiz you guys, I can't even go on with this.  Just tell me that's no one's reason.
5.  Yeah, I'll give you the shorter to type out thing too, but rrrreally...can that be our deciding factor?  Why not just go with Hsbnd, or Hus-b, or John (no matter his name, go with John.  It's fine.)?  Why make a completely new word? 

Hold on...where the hell did this even come from??  How did Huzzy not make the cut, or Huzby?   I prefer both of those.  You know you do.  You KNOW you do!!!

Anyway, like 1000 things are easier to type, so that isn't a good enough reason.  DFiHig4 was just easier to type than "husband," so go with that. 

Per uuuuuush (I know that sounds like "per ush-as-in-usher", but I mean it as "per-ush-as-in-usual"...I just don't know how to type that other than adding a bunch of u's.), this topic is completely unimportant.  Just thought of it, you know? 

My life is a series of "So this just popped into my head..."