Thursday, March 30, 2017

Things I have only recently learned about "going to the gym" because I have only recently started "going to the gym"

So much has happened since my last post in November--namely:
  • I have tapped out Netflix's crime drama genre, and have moved on to Netflix crime documentaries
  • I have Googled "namely" to make sure I was using it properly here
  • the US has fallen apart, and while there are at least six hundred things about Trump that I really dislike, one of the most personal things that I dislike has been that he's made me totally change my social media vibe, and now I post all sorts of real news and serious opinions all the time, like all those people I talked isht about up until now
  • I have realized how privileged I am in that the thing that affects me the most about Trump is that he's made me change my social media vibe
  • I finally started "going to the gym"
Here's a little background that you don't care about right now (see last post--none of this will matter until I die and you're all sooooo bummmmmed that we didn't party enough while I was still alive so you're thinking about "Weekend at Bernie's"-ing me):

Love my parents, love public education, but my brother and I learned NOTHING about nutrition growing up.  I still only have a very vague idea of what calories even are, and if you were to tell me something had 111 grams of fat, I would say "Ohhhh wwwowww rrrrreally?" because that could be an appropriate reaction whether 111 grams of fat was really high or really low.

We had a weekly rotating meal schedule at my childhood home:
  • Monday: Cathy chicken (thanks to church friend Cathy Olson, who introduced us to chicken marinated in Worcestershire and Lawry's seasoning salt)--but the Olsons got to have chicken breasts, and we had the thighs (further insight: we didn't have a lot of dollars growing up, and when I got old enough to be able to regularly afford chicken breasts instead of thighs, I thought I was living the DREAM, only to realize that chicken thighs are so much tastier.  My parents had it all figured out and we didn't even know.)
  • Tuesday: some sort of "wrap"--usually tuna wrap, which was tuna with lots of mayo and American cheese in flour tortillas, all rolled up
  • Wednesday: chili (from a can [because we loved it]) and cheese, OR chili-cheese dogs
  • Thursday: leftovers (see above)
  • Friday: spaghetti and meat sauce (which someone routinely spilled because whyyyy are those noodles soooo sliiiipperryyyy)
There was often salad available, but rarely taken advantage of by the kiddies.  It had a lot of croutons and that really creamy fake Olive Garden style Italian dressing, and my servings consisted mostly of croutons, the whitest, crunchiest pieces of lettuce in the bowl, and A LOT of dressing.  Like, sometimes so much that it made my jaw hurt like when you have old wine that you probably shouldn't be drinking still, but you hate waste so much.

Our weekly "home from school, watch the Disney Afternoon" snack was cookie dough.  Each weekend, my brother and I each made a batch of chocolate chip cookie dough (yes with raw eggs that yes we ate and yes we're good today but yes we may have had a tapeworm this whole time and never realized it), dyed it with red and blue food coloring (because how else could we tell our batches apart?!) and then ate it all week long.

"Diets" in my house were complicated--I won't name any names, but let's just say that only one person in my house ever "dieted" and the "diet" involved skipping LOTS of meals, or only purchasing "fat free" chemical-laden substitutes for food, or only eating frozen vegetables steamed so hard that they surely lost all nutritional value, and talking A LOT about other people's weight. 

Anyway, I was basically a case of  type two diabetes ready to bloom, but by luck of the draw, I have some good genes (did I ever tell you about the time my Grandpa came back to life?!) and a high metabolism that meant that I was a REAL fat baby, a REAL skinny kid, and then was basically the same size from age 17-32.  I know I know I know.

Here's what's happened from 32-33:

A very slow creep of about ten pounds that I couldn't just lose again by skipping a few lunches or watching "beginning yoga" on YouTube and always hurting myself because it's impossible to get into those poses while also watching someone on TV.

Here's what happened from 33-34:

Wait what the hell none of my clothes fit anymore.

Here's now:

So after my tried and true methods stopped working (and let's be real here--my "tried and true methods" were skipping lunch everyday a day for a week but then certainly eating bigger dinners to make up for it, or walk-running on a treadmill or elliptical for 30 minutes, twice a week, or trying to figure out yoga from YouTube videos, or walking around my neighborhood for an hour with pauses to choose a new podcast to start), and I legitimately couldn't zip up half of my work clothes, I realized that I needed to "diet" like I'd learned from watching my predecessors growing up, and started only margarine eating once a week. 

JK.

I realized that I was that person who actually had to pay someone to show me a new way to get my shiz together.

So I signed up for a gym where I pay someone to spend a few hours a week with who shows me all sorts of new things that I would have never tried on my own, and am usually terrified of, and that are all really hard. 

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for (can you guys reading this in the future when I'm dead even believe that I'm dead now and you'll never know what gym I signed up for?!?): here are some things I've recently learned about "going to the gym" because I have only recently started "going to the gym."
  • there are A LOT of areas on your body that can sweat that I didn't know were able to sweat.  Scalp sweat?!  Foot sweat?!  Seriously, I have lived a charmed life.  I had no idea.
  • my sweat still doesn't smell that bad (this is not a new lesson, but I'm really proud of it, so I wanted to include it)
  • it is not possible to FOR REAL go to the gym three times a week and only shower twice a week and still have friends.  RIP routine, I miss you, I love you, please come back to me.
  • it's possible to have yellowing, dead skin peeling off your palms from callouses but to also still have long, almond-shaped, sparkling rose gold finger nails
  • people at the gym will judge you for the nail polish, though
  • jumping where you jump from the ground with both feet together and land on something higher than the ground with both feet still together is so much harder than it looks or should be.  I mean, BABIES DO THIS.  But I can't do it.  
  • using a re-usable canvas shopping bag from Small Business Saturday as a "gym bag" is so embarrassing that someone had to tell me that it was embarrassing, because I was too far out of the loop to even know to be embarrassed by this 
  • it is possible to be so sore that it hurts to just be.  Like, it hurts to stand, then it really hurts while getting into a sitting position, then it keeps hurting when you're sitting, so you lay down, which hurts, and getting up hurts SO much, and then all the breathing hurts--you can be so sore that existing is sore
That's all for now.   Future people reading this after I die because it came up when you Googled my name and you just can't believe I'm gone: I recommend eating raw egg cookie dough because nothing happens when you do.  It's not the reason I died, I swear.  I actually may have died from being so sore and sneezing.  Please look into this.  Avenge me!!!
 


Wednesday, November 2, 2016

New spam friends OR Sheena's comin' home! OR some Netflix recommendations

Seven months off is a real shame.  Sorry world.  Just kidding--I know this will only become a thing when I die and you all read it and are like "No!  Why didn't I get to know her before her untimely death?"   

Don't worry guys--you didn't get to know me because I chose "watching so many shows on Netflix" over "meeting people" and I regret nothing.

Seriously though--did you know Netflix has like 100 crime dramas??!  For the SVU lovers of the world (we know who we are), it's a literal paradise.  LITERAL literal.  I feel like I'm in paradise whenever I watch a new one.  Here's a little preview to the remix:

SVU: it's amazing, duh, watch it
The Fall: terrible accents, totally worth watching
Broadchurch: seriously, did crime drama even exist before this show?! Totally worth watching
River: so weird, totally worth watching
Bloodline: kind of boring, totally worth watching
Sherlock: I don't even care about any other show in this world because I love Sherlock so much
Making a Murderer: does real life count as crime drama?  Totally worth watching.
The Bletchley Circle: I don't remember much about it other than that it was totally worth watching
American Crime: not great, but kind of great, and totally worth watching
Marcella: lots of layers (I think--not sure what that means), totally worth watching

There are more but I'm starting to get embarrassed.


Anyway, I got into it with another spammer named "Sheena."  She was REALLY verbose, but let me really Donald-Trump-her up. Save for a day when you have two free hours and have already polished off all the shows I just listed.



-----Original Message-----
From:
pscinn@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, April 20, 2016 12:05pm
To:
help@sgt.com
Subject: Help!!

Hello..Please can we talk?

From: Shannon email
To:
pscinn@hotmail.com
Subject: Re: FW: Help!!
Date: Wed, 20 Apr 2016 21:30:37 +0000

Hello yes!  We can talk!  What is happening?

On Thu, Apr 21, 2016 at 1:06 PM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Hello,

Thank you for responding to my email. I personally made a special research on the Internet address book and I came across your information. I am presently writing this mail to you from U.S Military base Kabul Afghanistan hoping that you will assist me. I find it pleasurable to offer you my partnership in business and I pray at this time that your e-mail contact address is still valid. I know you don't know me but I mean no harm sending you this note, just that I don't have anyone out there to talk to, as I lost my parents in a car Accident when I was 11 years old, I was raised up by my adopted aged parents, but they died years ago, the relatives of my adopted Parents throw me out of the house saying that I was not their real daughter. I know you can handle this money for me until I come over to meet with you, we can also build friendship with this transaction. I lived in Lake Jackson, Texas before joining the Force.

You may be wondering why I choose to trust a delicate matter like this in the care of a stranger, but this is the best I can do in my present situation and I would have trusted this kind of project in the hands of my Husband who was my closest confidant, but I lost him to cancer on 22nd April, 2006 5 months after we got married, and my only brother has ruined his life with hard drugs but he currently in rehab, hence my decision to work with a neutral person if we can establish some trust between ourselves instead of confiding in my buddies back home so that this little secret can be preserved. 

Let me start by introducing my self. My names are Sgt. Sheena Adams, I am assigned to 782nd Brigade Support Battalion, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division[3]. I am seeking your assistance to evacuate the sum of $10,500,000.00 (Ten Million, Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars) as far as I can be assured that it will be safe in your care until I complete my service here in Afghanistan.

SOURCE OF MONEY:
I and some other high ranking Officers made some deal on oil business over here in Kabul before my exit to Ghazni, Afghanistan . The deal worth $132 Million United States Dollars and after we've all shared the money I later realize $10.5 Million US DOLLARS which is my personal share of the deal, due to my status as a US Sergeant, I am not be able to move this huge funds to my account in United States to avoid further interrogation or face any kind of probation by the U.S government and I packaged my own share in a Digital lock briefcase and have sent it to the Red-Cross society, because there is no other way out to keep it with me here, so with the help of a German contact working with the UN here (his office enjoys some immunity) I was able to get the package out to a safe location entirely out of trouble spot. He does not know the real contents of the package, as I have deposited the consignment as a family valuables. Your acceptance to this would encourage me to send further information for us to proceed.

Furthermore, If my offer is of no appeal to you, delete this message and forget I ever contacted you. Do not destroy my career because you do not approve of my proposal. I believe that such opportunities only come ones' way once in a lifetime. I cannot let this chance pass me by. For once I find myself in total control of my destiny. This chance won't pass me by. I ask that you do not destroy my chance but make it a big reality for me,a quantum leap to a brighter horizon. If you will not work with me let me know so I find someone who can help me and let me move on with my life but do not destroy me. If you give me positive signals, I will give you the relevant details and initiate this process towards a conclusion. I send you this mail not without a measure of fear as to what the consequences might be, but I know within me that nothing ventured is nothing gained and that success and riches never come easy or on a platter of gold. Do not betray my confidence.

If you wish to proceed with this, please get back to me.

Regards,
Sgt. Sheena Adams



Date: Thu, 21 Apr 2016 13:31:06 -0700
Subject: Re: Help!!
From:
Shannon email
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com

Dear Sgt. Sheena,
I am in shock when I read your letter. I can't believe that someone like you who served your country (and my country--it is the same country) is worried about getting in trouble. This current president Barack Hussein Obama has really ruined things for you and I can't believe it.  I am glad I never supported him because he is ruining things for everyone, even regular people like you and me.
Is it ok if I just call you Sheena? I don't want to be disrespectful but you seem like a very nice girl.  Sheena (if it's ok), I am so glad you found me in the address book on the internet.  I care about the troops a lot and would really liek to help you.  Even more important, I have a cousin who lives in Texas, who you might know--his name is Terry.  Let me know if you knew Terry before the service.
Sheena please tell me how I can help you.  You have trusted me and now I will trust you.
Shannon



On Thu, Apr 21, 2016 at 5:08 PM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Greetings,
 
Thanks for your urgent response, attached is my staff ID. First and foremost it is a good thing that you have responded timely and I must use this medium to assure you that we will succeed in this business. I have more business deals to offer you and I will also connect you to some people that can make you a mega bucks person if you carry out this deal successfully to completion. I would give you info if we need to employ the service of an attorney, but the fact remains that communication outside this wall is difficult, wire communication is highly monitored, I am keeping this secret as I would want you to keep it as a secret too. I would like to be sure of your willingness, trustworthiness and commitment to execute this transaction with me, I cannot afford to compromise these virtues considering the money involved, it is necessary for me to be sure of the person to whom I will be entrusting this transaction, and my trust is not given out lightly. I want this large sum of money transferred with your assistance. I want to know if you are willing to follow up this business seriously. I must use this medium to let you know that this transaction is LEGAL AND RISK FREE okay?, I will ensure that we do everything possible from our end here for you to have a safe delivery of the funds. I have a very good, trusted and reliable security courier contact used mostly by our forces in Jordan, that can send goods easily through a private military way, to anywhere in the world, without them being checked at any port of entry. They can deliver this money for you easily, to any address of your choice.
 
The baggage will be tagged as personal effects and covered with a diplomatic coverage consignment trunk box, and the courier company will not know the contents of the boxes. A few friends have used this means to convey goods, without being checked because of the diplomatic coverage system. Their charges are very high, but I will negotiate a way out from this end and pay for the delivery till it gets to your door step anywhere and I will follow up immediately and meet with you for disbursement after you have received it. I am very sure you will know the best way to handle this money for us, when it gets to your base. I will start making arrangements as to sending the merchandise to you. I will send the total since I can not take any chances by keeping cash on me. Your percentage stands at 50% so that the feeling of greed won't arise,if you know what I mean. I have more but this is the maximum the security agency can carry across this border. Meanwhile' I will like to know what you do for a living? Are you married with kids? Can you handle these funds? I will also want to see your passport copy or id/, driver’s License if you have one so I can know who I am dealing with.
 
We need to build trust okay? The only people that knew about this is just you and I. You know that security is very important, you can not trust anybody therefore, remember to keep it secret. The total sum amount in the box is $10,500,000.00 (Ten Million, Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars) ($100 Bills) and I hope that you can handle it? I hope you are okay with this? Everything must be done by email until the funds gets to your possession. I hope you understand me?  Where we are now we can only communicate through our military communication facilities, which are secured so no body can monitor our emails, then I can explain in details to you. I will only reach you through email, because our calls might be monitored, and I don't want to be monitored or for any one to know about this development. 
 
IF YOU ARE READY TO DO THIS AND CARRY OUT MY WISH, THEN SEND THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION'S:-
 
Your Name 
Your Mailing address (Not P.O. Box Please) 
Your Private Mobile Line
Your ID proof
 
As soon as I receive your reply that you are ready to proceed under these terms, then I will furnish you with all details of the security company and also how to secure the release of my consignment. But if you have any questions up to this stage, please ask and I will be more than happy to respond to them. And I will also send you all the necessary documentations to conclude this transaction and the security company's details as I will meet you once the consignment get to your home address.
 
Once again thanks for your response.
 
Regards,
Sgt. Sheena Adams



Date: Fri, 22 Apr 2016 11:48:21 -0700

Subject: Re: Help!!
From:
Shannon email
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com
Dear Sgt Sheena (I am going back to being formal because you did not tell me if I could call you Sheena)-
You have given me a lot to think about.  But I really want to help you, so I will answer your questions.
I am 54 and I used to be married, but my wife ran away from me a few years ago for a few reasons: 1--she said she did not love me, and 2--she said living without me would be so much better for her.  I had a feeling this would happen, but I was still really angry.  I am still hoping she comes back though.  Are you going to get married again? 
For a living, I am out living on disability.  I used to have a job with a real estate office, but a deer got into the office and really messed me up, so now I don't have to work, because of the injuries.  It's been hard paying all my bills on time, because I'm a big spender.
Well, I guess I am willing to help you get this money back to the USA.  When will you be coming back?  When you come back, where will you live?  Do you have children from before your husband died?  Please let me know so I can begin to trust you.
Ok, here's what you asked me:

Your Name Shannon
Your Mailing address (Not P.O. Box Please)
328 Washington Street Hollywood Florida
Your Private Mobile Line
I don't have a private mobile line, because I share one with my ex wife.  It would not be safe to call us on that line.  Please let's only use email because I don't want her to think I am cheating.
Your ID proof
I put a picture of my drivers license on this email.  I don't have a passport because I only fly American Airlines.
Ok, please answer my questions. 
Shannon


On Sat, Apr 23, 2016 at 12:05 PM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Hello Shannon,

Yes i would love to get married again, i love been love and falling in-love. Love is a beautiful thing. You are an handsome good looking man and i think you don't deserve what you are getting from your wife. 

I miss that feeling of been love, that feeling that you know someone is out there who loves you so much. God has been my surviver for the past couple of years now and with him i know all this are possible.  

Regards,
Sgt. Sheena Adams


How are you doing today? i was about replying your message but i have to quickly send to you the contact details of the security/courier because i have been on this since yesterday.

It is really difficult for me to be here on the Internet for hours because of the nature of my assignment over here. I usually do have limited time here and when i do i like to make good use of the time.

I'm really teach by your last mail. You made me remember allot of things, i know how you feel when you been disappointed by someone you love so much. 

This is not the end of the road, you have to continue to love your wife and hopefully one day she will be back with you once again. You much not give up on the person you love so much. And yes you can call me Adams. 

Regards,
Sgt. Sheena Adams



Date: Mon, 25 Apr 2016 15:12:51 -0700

Subject: Re: Help!!
From:
Shannon email
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com
Dear Adams,
I am a little confused because I was hoping to call you Sheena, but you said you wanted me to call you Adams, which seems like we may not be close ever.  That is your last name, isn't it?  I guess I don't know how they do things in Texas.
Thank you for saying that about my exwife.  I would love to have a new wife someday.  When you return to the USA you will have to meet up with me to get your briefcase, right?  I am hoping we could meet up for a weekend together where we meet, and I get to spend some time with you eating meals and swimming in the hotel pool, etc.  Then at the end of the weekend, I could give you the briefcase, and we could talk about how we could maybe spend some more time together.
Thank you for the replying to me, because I was worried.  NOw please help[ me understand what to do next.
Shannon


On Mon, Apr 25, 2016 at 4:07 PM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Dear Shannon,

I'm always delighted to read your mail and hear from you. I thought you insisted on you calling me Adams, anyway you can call me Sheena. I like it and prefer when i'm been called to as Sheena especially from someone like you who i'm looking forward to building a friendship with and also looking forward to meet soon. 

Thanks you very much for your kind words and your desire to meet me and spend some time with me, I would really love to meet you too and get to know more about you. I so much have confident in you in receiving this package for me and i pray almighty GOD to continue to bless you for your commitment in doing this.

I have sent to you the contact details of the Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd (D.F.C.S) and also the deposit certificate. You are required to contact the courier person in the name of Mr Micheal Phillips on (exp.diplomatic.cargo@outlook.in).

All you need to do is to send him an email stating that you are contacted him for the delivery of a Consignment Tag Number: DFCS/00X/YW5/XXZ from/sent by Mrs Sheens Adams. You are also to provide him with your contact telephone number. Finf below again the contact details of the Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd (D.F.C.S);

Shipping Agency & Dispatch Director:
Mr. Michael Phillips
Phone: +91(959)-9147-243 (Ext 12)
Fax  : +91 987 544 9098

Respectfully,
Sgt. Sheena Adams.



On Wed, Apr 27, 2016 at 12:40 PM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Dear Shannon,

It is good news to know that you have contacted Mr. Phillips for the release of our box to you. May the almighty God continue to bless you and your family for your very kind and prompt response to my emails,indicating your willingness to assist me transfer this funds to your country or any country that you will recommend, am well impressed by your person and I feel I have found the right person, but time will tell. As you know, the success of this transaction will depend on our total mutual trust. I want everything to be clear to you right now but you have to read carefully.

The box: The box contains the money and will be protected with a pin code and KEY which I will make available to only you alone. You shall not in any case disclose the content of the box to the diplomat for security reasons.I told him that is your personal belonging. As soon as you receive the box and the pin code, you shall have in mind that your percentage will be 50% of the total sum while you shall ensure that my own percentage of 50% is intact.

Please note that I have all my confidence on you so do not disappoint me at the middle of this transaction. there is a secret combination code numbers require to open the package box and I am here by giving it to you. The code is 311 and I will be sending the KEY to open the box to your home address, immediately the consignment reach your designation. Please be informed that the Agent (Mr. Michael Phillips) do not have this code for security reasons I will advice you never to give it to any one. 

Let me know when you have complete access to consignment. Keep me informed at all times.

Attached here is the photo of the consignment box.

This for sending in your ID and your photo. I really do appreciate. 

Your Partner,
Sgt. Sheena Adams



Date: Wed, 27 Apr 2016 15:54:49 -0700

Subject: Re: Help!!
From:
Shannon email
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com
Dear Sheena,
Wow hearing from you is one of the best parts of my day.  How have you been doing?  I have been feeling a little sick.  Yesterday, I ate one of my favorite things.  Here's what it is: you make some macaroni and cheese, and you open up some chili.  Then you put the two of them together, and then you have them mixed up as lunch or dinner.  IT's usually very delicious, but yesterday, I didn't have any milk for the macaroni, so instead, I used vanilla coffee creamer, and let me tell you Sheena, it was not good at all.  I will make it for you once you come here to visit me, but I promise to use milk and not creamer.
Do you have TV out there?  Do you ever watch a show called The View?  I was watching that today and you know what, my exwife was there right in the crowd.  I saw her because they showed the crowd with the cameras, and she was there, wearing my old sweater.  It was a sweater made for women, but I never knew, so I wore it for a while.  She looked really different--shorter hair than it used to be, which was pretty sad for me to see, because short hair always reminds me of when things were bad.  Actually, it might have not been her, because I don't think she can drive, but it looked like her with the sweater and all.
I was wondering if when you got here we could start exercising together maybe.  Do you have to exercise a lot for the Arny?  It sure looks like it when I see the Army on TV/movies.  Here's what I would like to do--hike, run, job, and race.  Here's why: I would like to get fit so when we spend time together, you won't be embarrassed because I used to be pretty fat.
Well thank you for the important secret numbers you shared with me.  I promise I won't tell anyone.  The secret is safe.  I have already emailed Mr. Michale about how to get the suitcase, so I hope to get it very soon and then you and I will be able to share what's inside.  I won't say what it is in case someone is also reading this email to be safe.
Well, I hope to hear from you soon.
Shannon


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Wed, Apr 27, 2016 at 3:43 PM
Subject: Re: Regarding. Shannon
To: "Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S"

Hello Mr. Michael-
Well here I am confirming that I am ready to help Sheena in any way that I can.  My name is Shannon, my address is328 Washington Street Hollywood Florida, and I don't have a private mobile.
What else do you need for me to go ahead?
Thank you,
Shannon

On Wed, Apr 27, 2016 at 5:00 PM, Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S <exp.diplomatic.cargo@outlook.in> wrote:
Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd (D.F.C.S)
23 Khariki Port, New Delhi
Central India
Tel:+91(959)-9147-243

Regarding. Shannon

   Your mail was well receive, be informed that we are still waiting for the deposit certificate. Without a copy of the deposit certificate it will be impossible to verify authenticity of the delivery package with us. Secondly you are also to provide to this office your contact telephone number, this is very mandatory because I might have to contact you over the telephone for if need be. 

Once again, you are required to provide to this office the deposit certificate of your consignment with us for verification and also your contact telephone number before we can proceed with the delivery process. Thank you ! ! !

Always reach my office for guidance and information's.

Contact Period!
Between the hours of 8.30 am - 6.30 Pm (Monday-Friday) and 8.30 am - 3.00 pm (Saturday). Please feel free to contact us via telephone/email or fax on our operating hours.

Sincerely,
Mr. Michael Phillips

Senior Partner @ Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd.
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Thu, Apr 28, 2016 at 9:41 AM
Subject: Re: Provide The Deposit Certificate & Your Contact Telephone Number.
To: "Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S"

Dear Mr. Michael--
Well I guess this is what you need.  I hope so at least because this is all that SHeena sent to me.
HEre's a problem I have though...my phone is currently not working.  I used to share a phone with my exwife but here's the problem, she stopped paying the bills and now it doens't work.  Could we continue to email instead of calling because I really want to help but I don't have a phone.  Which airport is the briefcase coming to?  I need to know so I can be sure I am ready to get it.
Shannon

On Fri, Apr 29, 2016 at 11:58 AM, Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S <exp.diplomatic.cargo@outlook.in> wrote:
Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd (D.F.C.S)
23 Khariki Port, New Delhi
Central India
Tel:+91(959)-9147-243

Regarding. Shannon Hutchison Caraveo

   This is to inform you that your consignment has been registered fully in your name and ready for delivery, but I have an issue here in India airport authority/customs, which has caused a delay. I have been informed as the Agent attached to the package by the airline to produce the inspection clearance fee for the consignment delivery. The consignment is tagged as personal affects and covered with a diplomatic coverage consignment trunk box. And the courier company did not know the contents of the box. As the agent, i am sending you this email, to inform you of the situation on hand. I have been requested to pay the inspection clearance fee and the airline/customs have made it very mandatory that all consignment must be inspected and cleared.

That is the reason for this email. The sender has paid for the delivery charges to my company but what the airline is demanding now is the inspection clearance certificate that will cover the consignment.

The airline is demanding for the inspection clearance policy that will be covering your package before it can be put on board and delivered to you. The inspection clearance covering your consignment amount's is (40,343.92 INR) which equivalent to $587.00 United State Dollars and you will be informed how to make this payment as soon as you're ready to do so.

We sincerely apologize any form of inconveniences that this development might have caused you. This is non-negotiable, as this is a directive from the Customs Department. 

NOTE: You will be given full details of your shipment process as soon as payment is effected for your insurance policy covering your consignment. I will re she-due my ticket as soon as this fee is paid to the customs officers here.

Let us know the Payment Option chosen so we can send to you the adequate remittance details to help you remit the fee's to the New Delhi Customs Department. I have attached a scan of document above.

Ensure to respond as soon as you receive this mail in order for us to be aware of your present standing as regards this new development. This will enable us know what further necessary actions to take.

I have been trying to reach you on the phone number you provided but to no avail. 

Always reach my office for guidance and information's.

Contact Period!
Between the hours of 8.30 am - 6.30 Pm (Monday-Friday) and 8.30 am - 3.00 pm (Saturday). Please feel free to contact us via telephone/email or fax on our operating hours.

Sincerely,
Mr. Michael Phillips

Senior Partner @ Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd


On Fri, Apr 29, 2016 at 10:20 AM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Dear Shannon,

What is wrong with you? I just read your mail now and you have stated that you have been feeling sick, Please i would not like to hear that, always take good care of yourself please. I really like the part where you said some macaroni and cheese, i love that combination. I think you must be a really good cook. I would love you to cook for me when i finally arrive. I'm really looking forward for you to make that combination for me when i visit, i swear i'm going to enjoy every bit of it.

We hardly have time to watch TV over here. I'm always on duty and you know peace keeping in this part of the word can be very difficult, but this is what i have sign for and i love doing my job, i love serving my country and i love saving life and bring peace to a war turn community and country. I would love to ask do you still communicate with your ex-wife?, I understand how you must have felt thinking she was the one you saw in the crown on the show, but i know deep down inside me you are fine and you are going to be fine.

I love exercise and yes we could exercise together, we have a routine for exercise and it helps to keep the body and mind in shape. Of course when you exercise you will born out allot of fat and you will be back to shape. I promise to guard you on that part.

Please make sure you keep the secret number to yourself, do not disclose to anybody not even Mr Micheal Phillips because he do not know the content of the package. You know the package was registered and sent and family valuables, i will send you the keys to the box as soon as the package gets to you. Always update me with your correspondent with Mr Micheal. Thank you very much for what you are doing for me and I pray GOD almighty give you the grace and strength to finish this for me.

Your Partner,
Sgt. Sheena Adams



Date: Fri, 29 Apr 2016 11:19:17 -0700

Subject: Re: Help!!
From:
Shannon email
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com
Dear Sheena,
Wow it is great to hear from you, because I was getting worried.  I hear all about people overseas in the war getting killed.  The movie American Sniper was real, and people died left and right.
I am happy to tell you that I'm feeling better, and I'm so glad you like some macaroni and cheese.  I will tell you I am a pretty good cook, because did you see what I made?  I wish I had sent you a photo, because It was great. 
I wish you had more TV time, because I worry about you girl.  I really do.
Sometimes I pick up the phone because it was one that my exwife and I shared so sometimes I would hear her making calls on the line, but I never said one word to her after she left, because I didn't want her to know I was listening and hang right up.  I think I told you how I got messed up by that deer in the office...it has left me looking pretty fat, so I didn't want her to see me, but I promise Sheena when you get here I will work hard and get into shape.  I hope you can help me with military training.
Ok I hope that you know that I would never tell the numbers to anyone, not even my own mother, but that wouldn't matter because she can't hear, but I would still never tell anyone. 
I hope to hear from you again soon.
Shannon


On Sun, May 1, 2016 at 11:25 AM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Dear Shannon,

Why have you been so silence? I have yet to receive any emails from you, i'm very worried because this is on of you. I am surprise getting here there's no more from you. As i speak to you now i'ms so worried and confuse because i don't know what is happening and i don't know if you are fine and okay.

I do not know what is the present situation of the delivery. Mr dear please response to me and inform me what is going on. I'm too worried at the moment. I will continue to pray and hope everything is all right. 

Your Partner,
Sgt. Sheena Adams


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Mon, May 2, 2016 at 10:23 AM
Subject: Re: Your Urgent Respond Needed.‏‏‏‏ (I Am Still Here At The Airport Waiting For Your Response)
To: "Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S"

Dear Mr Michael-
I am sorry for the delay...I had a troubling weekend that I won't get into now.  Well I am sorry to hear about the hold up in India, but I understand.  The good news is that I have a brother there who I already sent the money to.  Where can he meet you to pay the money?
Shannon

On Mon, May 2, 2016 at 10:51 AM, Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S <exp.diplomatic.cargo@outlook.in> wrote:
Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd (D.F.C.S)
23 Khariki Port, New Delhi
Central India
Tel:+91(959)-9147-243

Regarding. Shannon Hutchison Caraveo

   Thanks for your mail. We would effect the dispatch of your CONSIGNMENT to your place of residence in your country immediately the corresponding charges is received.

It takes maximum 24 Hours to deliver your CONSIGNMENT to your home address. Example, if you pay for the inspection charges today, within the next One "1" day you will have access to your CONSIGNMENT. For the prompt dispatch of your CONSIGNMENT today, You advised to locate the nearest Money Gram outlet and effect payment for inspection clearance charges $587.00 USD and the payment should be made via Money Gram to the custom account officer name with the details given below:-

Receiver's Name – Dave Harris
Address - 101 Airport Road, New Delhi, India.
Amount to pay- $587.00 USD

You are required to send a copy of the evidence of payment to your handling agent as well for confirmation. A receipt of the above payment will be issued to you from our office along with your consignment. As soon as we receive confirmation and evidence of payment of the above charges, we will dispatch your CONSIGNMENT immediately. The date and time of departure and expected date of delivery will be sent to you. It will take 24 hours to get your CONSIGNMENT delivered to You As you will be required to sign for the CONSIGNMENT and to do this, you will need either your international passport as identification or your driver's license. Please ensure to re-confirm your delivery address if there is any change. Also you can send the following information via email as they appear on the Payment Slip:

1. Name and address of sender
2. Amount sent
3. Reference Number
4. Country from which payment was made



Kindly Note: Due to the nature of this delivery we do not accept third parties, you are expected to follow the above instruction and make the necessary clearance payment and get back to us with the payment information. You can find the Money Gram agent in any Walmart in your location. 

Awaiting your payment confirmation and we're glad to be of service to you and do email back, if additional details or information's are required. Thank you!

Always reach my office for guidance and information's.

Contact Period!
Between the hours of 8.30 am - 6.30 Pm (Monday-Friday) and 8.30 am - 3.00 pm (Saturday). Please feel free to contact us via telephone/email or fax on our operating hours.

Sincerely,
Mr. Michael Phillips

Senior Partner @ Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Mon, May 2, 2016 at 11:15 AM
Subject: Re: Awaiting your payment confirmation‏.
To: "Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S"

Hey Mr. Michael-
I am not sure you got my last email...I have a brother who lives in India and he is going to bring the cash to you.  I had a very bad experience with moneygram and do not trust them.  I sent my brother a check in the mail and he is going to spend his own money to give to you and then will deposit my check when it arrives in a week.
How can he arrange to meet Dave Harris?  Does he have another email?
Shannon

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Tue, May 3, 2016 at 9:49 AM
Subject: Re: Why the delay in responding to our mail?
To: "Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S"

Dear Mr Michael-
Hmmm I did not get an email from you.  It must be because the header of your email is so large, it may be too large for my inbox.
Do not worry--my brother has cash for you right now.  I just sent him the check to pay him back.  I will ask Sheena to be sure, but this is the easiest way for me to get the money to you.  As I already said, I do not feel comfortable sending money from money gram and I don't have any Western union here.  I will have my brother meet you.  He is very trustworthy and will drive anywhere to meet you.  Since you said the address where Dave will be is 101 Airport Road, New Delhi, India. that is perfect because my brother lives near there also in New Delhi.  It's funny but his name is also Dave, so that's helpful in the meeting.
Ok, let me know when to have Dave meet up.
Shannon



Date: Tue, 3 May 2016 09:55:27 -0700
Subject: Re: Help!!
From:
Shannon email
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com
Dear Sheena,
Wow it has been too long.  I'm sorry, I have some bad news about why I haven't emailed you back.  Please don't tell Mr Michael, because I really want him to trust me, but I feel like I know you so well that I can tell you anything.
Well Sheena, four days ago, I was walking down the road and know what I saw?  Right in front of me, I saw the deer that really messed me up and has led to me no longer being able to work.  When I saw that deer, I don't know what happened, because I was just so angry, and the next thing I know, I was in a police car and deer blood was all over me.  I think I may have beat the deer up badly, and I had to be arrested to stop the beating.
I am so sorry Sheena, I hope you don't get angry about this.  I am not a violent man, but I was so upset when I saw that deer, and was reminded all about the day that deer hurt me, and just punched and punched. 
Anyway the good news is that I'm not in jail anymore, and that I am working with Mr Michale to get the money for the case delivery all settled.  He seems so kind.
Shannon


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Diplomatic Freight Cargo Services Ltd D.F.C.S
Date: Tue, May 3, 2016 at 4:02 PM
Subject: RE: Do not contact this office anymore
To: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo

Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd (D.F.C.S)
23 Khariki Port, New Delhi
Central India
Tel:+91(959)-9147-243

Regarding. Shannon Hutchison Caraveo

   It is obvious you are not ready to follow our instruction, we can not continue to linger on a particular delivery process for this long. I had already send an email to the sender of the consignment. Please do not contact us anymore for any kind of delivery.  

Always reach my office for guidance and information's.

Contact Period!
Between the hours of 8.30 am - 6.30 Pm (Monday-Friday) and 8.30 am - 3.00 pm (Saturday). Please feel free to contact us via telephone/email or fax on our operating hours.

Sincerely,
Mr. Michael Phillips

Senior Partner @ Diplomatic Freight & Cargo Services Ltd

On May 3, 2016, at 4:06 PM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Dear Shannon,

Thank you very much for your effort, Mr Micheal sent me an email narrating how you have refuse to act according to his directives and couple with what you have writing in your last mail i'm tempted to believe him

I really appreciate you for your time, but i have decided to find another trustworthy person who can help me in receiving this package. Thank you once again and it was nice knowing you. 

Your Partner,
Sgt. Sheena Adams




From: Shannon email
Subject: Re: Help!!
Date: Wed, 4 May 2016 07:30:18 -0700
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com

Dear sheena--

I am so upset.  What did mr Michael tell you?  I am ready to help and he is not helping me.  Just tell me what I need to do!!!

Shannon

Sent from my iPhone



On Wed, May 4, 2016 at 11:36 AM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Dear Shannon,

Thanks for your email., I just returned from  duty  this night together with my troops, as there have been series of suicide bomb attacks in Afghanistan during my stay here till now, and I have been overworking myself trying to bring lasting peace to the people of Afghanistan.

I sent the diplomat an email to explain to me why they should be asking for more money after all they have made me pay for the Delivery Charges. Well he just responded to me now with reasons why they demanded for the inspection clearance for the package. so in regards to an inspection clearance fee, demanded by the airport authority in New Delhi, India. I was surprised my self when I got the message from the diplomat.

You are not supposed to make any payment before the parcel gets to you. all properties deposited have to be airlifted and evacuated by the United Nations task force to New Delhi. This unforeseen became very necessary now. The handling company has it's headquarter located in London, and now the package is in New Delhi, That is the reason the airport authority in New Delhi is demanding for the inspection clearance fee. We have already paid for the delivery fee (courier charges) which amounted to almost $10,000 US DOLLARS because it is a DIPLOMATIC COURIER SHIPMENT. And the diplomat told me that he immediately Notify you as he come against this situation.

Please you are to help me for the inspection clearance fee I know you are not supposed to pay any money to this but as you can see this is not my making nor yours, You should not be scared of the situation, all things are okay. The package is already out of Afghanistan, and the Diplomat need to ship it to you. There is nothing I can do from this end due to the tight security Network here. Please be inform that you will deduct this fees from the consignment immediately its get to you and then you will take your percentage and as you know the package is already registered in your name as the beneficiary and as such i will not want both of us to loose this package.

The agent said this inspection clearance fee the New Delhi airport authority is demanding for is not included in the delivery fee, The agent has explained things to me and I think we need to act fast to save the package from the hands of the authorities over there in New Delhi. The diplomat is very worried, due to the situation in the airport. From what he has explained to me the inspection clearance fee is an unexpected fee and nobody ever thought this will happen. Please note that if you help pay this fee now the diplomat will secure the inspection clearance and make the delivery and immediately he make the delivery to you just go ahead and deduct the fees you have paid before taking your 50% off. I hope you understand me point?

He also said he has sent to you information on how you are to send the money down to India, but you keep insisting that you have a brother over there in India who will handover the money to him. I was wondering if you really made this request to him because you had promise to me keep this confidential to yourself, so how would you now ask your brother to handover money to Mr Micheal. This is so disturbing to me and i'm very worried about this. Please follow the directives of Mr Micheal and send the money via the method he has told you. Please do this as soon as possible, I have been unable to eat or think straight for the past couple of days because of all this. Reply to me on time.

I await your positive response soonest.

Respectfully,
Sgt. Sheena Adams.

From: Shannon email
Subject: Re: Help!!
Date: Thur, 5 May 2016 08:30:18 -0900
To:
sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com

Dear Sheena--
I am so scared for you to hear about bombings!  I hope you are still ok.  These bombings aren't even on the news, which makes me so scared.
Well here is the thing, at first I was so upset about Mr Michale asking me for money, because you never mentioned any money.  But I prayed about it, and God told me that this was important, and that there are always unexpected fees.  That really hit home for me because you know what, the other day, I was going to get some gas, and realized that my car was leaking gas all over the sidewalk, and almost blew me up, right there in the street.  It was an unexpected fee, but I had to pay it, just like with the suitcase.
But my real problem is that I don't have any Western Union here in my hometown, and I can't drive to one because of the gas situation, and I had a very VERY bad experience with Moneygram, where I tried to send money to my brother who lives overseas and the money was stolen.  I can't afford to do that again.  I just can't do that again...the money I lost was enough for a week's worth of groceries, and that was a week that I really needed the groceries.
I thought I was just so lucky that my brother is already in India and not far from the address where I was supposed to send the money, so I called him and said "Hey man please go pay this extra money, I can't tell you why at all, because it's something that's a secret, but I will send you a check in the mail."  He said "ok" so you can be sure he doesn't know the secret, Sheena. 
Could you please just tell Mr Michael that it's ok for my brother to pick up the money?  His name is Dave and I promise you he would never get you in trouble.  He is about the same height as me, which is pretty regular man height, with brown hair and will be wearing a white shirt with COORS on it.
He can get there as soon as it's daytime in India, and then the case will be on the way.
Please say it's ok Sheena, because I'm getting so scared.
https://ssl.gstatic.com/ui/v1/icons/mail/images/cleardot.gif

Shannon


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Sgt. Sheena Adams
Date: Sun, May 8, 2016 at 2:09 PM
Subject: RE: Answer me if you sending the money or not?
To: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo

Dear Shannon,

I have been away for the past couple of day for I have been on duty and i was assign on a mission to a near by city and i was there for a couple of days. It is really devastating to see what woman and little children are going through here on a daily basics.

We try to give them the basic needs they need and we try to support and encourage them. My experience here is a life changing experience. Like i have said to you before, we will have allot to talk about when i eventually come back home.

I was really waiting and hoping for a positive response from you in regards to my last email sent to you. As i speak to you the package is still there at the custom department New Delhi International Airport, I have pleaded several times with Mr Micheal to hold on for more time so that the payment can be made.

I will like to say here that you do not want to help me on this, I have told you before that i would have to look for a trust wordy person who will help me receive this package. I really do appreciate your effort and time Mr Shannon but it of a huge pain to me that you have disappointed my at this crucial stage.

I would not want your brother to involve in this and secondly Mr Micheal has said he has not yet receive any call from your so called brother. Please if you know you are not willing to send the money using Money Gram or Western Union as instructed by My Micheal then forget about it and lets go our separate ways.

I have not be able to concentrate for the past couple of days, all i do is cry all because of this delay. I'm sure you don't know how much this package mean to me. I would not want to continue with this feeling of mine crying everyday. I will start to search for another person who will help me with this process after receiving your response if you know you cannot send the money needed. 

I was really looking forward to meeting you in person and doing all what we have talked about, but all that feelings of mine are beginning to fade away. Just get back to me with your response so i can know what next to do. Mr Shannon its either you are sending the money through Money Gram or Western Union or not. Kindly be mature and professional in answering me in good faith. 

Respectfully,
Sgt. Sheena Adams.



---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Wed, May 11, 2016 at 9:03 AM
Subject: Re: Answer me if you sending the money or not?
To: "Sgt. Sheena Adams"

Wow Sheena.  I thought better of you.  I never said my brother was going to call anyone, because that doesn't make any sense.  I might have been willing to send the money another way, but not after this rude email.
I guess if you don't want my help anymore, I won't help.
I am truly disappointed in you, because I thought we would be lifelong friends.


On Wed, May 11, 2016 at 11:51 AM, Sgt. Sheena Adams <sgtmshe.adams@hotmail.com> wrote:
Dear Shannon,

I have never sound or talk rude to anybody, i'm a very easy going person. Maybe when we finally see you will know more about me. Would you have prefer i should be happy the way things has gone? this delivery/transaction has been stagnant for the past couple of days going to two weeks and nothing has been done. 

I keep receiving emails from Mr Micheal on a daily basics telling me the package will soon be confiscated, he has told me that he has not receive any emails from you for the past two weeks. Anytime i send you email it takes you days before replying me, every time i come here i get frustrated not getting any emails from you, so tell me should i be happy about this? 

I don't mean to sound rude because i know you are helping me in this but you have yet to make me feel you really want to help me on this. The delivery of the package was never suppose to take this long. I get frustrated everyday i'm tired of crying all because you have refuse to send the money needed. I have tried to make you understand i have even beg you to do this because of me.

I have think of the possibility of us meeting, i keep saying in my mind how i would feel seeing you for the very first time. been a lifelong friend with you has been my dream and i have been anticipating it ever since we started talking. I beg you again in the name of GOD please send the necessary money needed and follow the instructions of Mr Micheal so that he can have the package cleared from the airport and deliver to you asap.

Mr Micheal has also inform me that he have since sent to you information on how you are to send the money through Money Gram. My lovely Shannon please send the money quickly and send an email to Mr Micheal. Like i have said before you can take out the money you spent when the package eventually gets to you. Thank you very much for your willingness to help me on this. Please respond to me on time. 

Respectfully,
Sgt. Sheena Adams.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Thu, May 12, 2016 at 10:23 AM
Subject: Re: I am sorry my friend.
To: "Sgt. Sheena Adams"

Sheena,
Wow I am so sorry.  I guess I misunderstood you when you emailed me last.  I have been so frustrated about all of this because you think I am refusing to send the money when I know that I have the money ready for you, right there where the package is.  My brother would do anything in the world to help me, even take money to a stranger, because he doesn't know about the case.  The money is there already.
Now that I know Mr Michale won't be helpful in taking the money, I have to have my brother send me my money back, and then I will be able to send it via Western Union.  I cannot send it via Money Gram because last time I tried that, the money was stolen.  I was trying to help a friend who was in England and got robbed and was living in a library, and I sent the money from Money Gram and you know what, I never heard from her again.  I don't knwo for sure but I think she was killed in the library where she was living because why else would she never tell me she got the money.  So you can see I do not trust Money Gram.
Mr Michael hasn't received any emails from me because his last email said DO NOT CONTACT THIS OFFICE AGAIN.  Are you telling me I should contact him again?
Love, Shannon


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Shannon Hutchison Caraveo
Date: Thu, May 14, 2016 at 10:13 AM
Subject: Re: I am sorry my friend.
To: "Sgt. Sheena Adams"

Sheena,
WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO US.  WHY HAVEN’T YOU REPLIED TO ME. I HAVE BEEN SO OPEN ABOUT ALL THE THINGS WITH THE DEER AND MY EXWIFE KAREN AND ALL OF MY HOPES ABOUT GETTING TO LOSE WEIGHT WITH YOU. WHAT HAPPENED TO US.  PLEASE TELL ME.  I HAVE BEEN SO STRATEGIC WITH MY TYPOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Love, Shannon