Just checking in, as I like to do, whenever something really really important comes up. Since I uncovered the Jim Bakker scam (and didn't really do anything about it), I have had a simple, easy go at things, until this weekend, when I finally had enough.
I was in a public restroom and saw one of those "Hey lil ladies and gals out there, stop flushing your pads, the plumbing is old, ok?!" signs and thought to myself "WHO MAKES THESE EFFING SIGNS?!" Someone needs to meet up with them and let them (let's be real--him) know that literally no one does this, ever, anywhere in the whole USA.
I'd venture to say that this is true of women in general, but I have never traveled to a place with bidets, so I don't want to speak out of turn.
Anyway, to the mass producers of these little gems:
WE'RE GOOD, OK? NO ONE DOES THIS.
To anyone out there who has never used a sanitary napkin/pad, allow me to fill you in: they're terrible contraptions that are equal parts cotton fiber, chemicals, plastic and some sort of stick-um. After normal usage, they'll be heavy because they're full of blood. When you see that list of attributes, do you think, "That sounds like something that will for sure dissolve in water if I just give it a chance--I will flush this."?
Good news: neither does any woman.
Asking women not to flush these is like asking men not to flush a full tower of Post-it notes with plastic wrapper still attached, after you've soaked it in blood for an hour.
No one would flush 500 Post-its.
No one flushes pads.
Stop asking me not to flush pads. I don't. I never did. I wouldn't.
I mean, do I wish they were flush-able? Sure. It's not fun having to get all up in the bloody cotton/plastic/stick-um business...but know what's worse that wrapping that up and throwing it away? Trying to flush it, having the toilet immediately be like "nnnnnope!", backing up and flooding the whole bathroom.
Because that's what would happen.
Because it's like flushing a Post-it tower.
Long story short...please stop asking us not to do things we aren't doing. Save that signage space for more important bathroom business, like:
- "Hey everyone--let's just assume that there are people waiting to use this stall. Could you not be on your phone right now and hurry up?" or
- "Wouldn't it be great if there were wet wipes in here, so after you kindly fold up that bloody pad and throw it away, you could wipe off your hands?", or
- "If you insist on hovering over the seat while you pee, you better wipe your splatter off!", or
- "Trans people aren't going to attack you in here, so stop posting those bullshit articles."
Last caveat: I get that some signs also refer to not flushing tampons. Stop asking about that too, because...we're all still going to flush them. Thinking that neatly wrapping those things up for a trash disposal is even a possibility is just as uninformed as thinking people flush Post-it towers. Not gonna happen. Just fix your pipes, ok?