Monday, March 1, 2010

HERE'S something I love.

Light up rings.
There is NO situation where a light up ring isn’t completely appropriate. I’d wear one in your wedding. They’re funny because they’re so huge, and then, as if that wasn’t hilarious enough, they frigging light up.
You know the ones I’m talking about—you usually bust them out for bachelorette parties, and you typically have to buy them at those creepy sex shops that you have to run into, constantly saying “bachelorette” loudly, so they don’t think you’re there to buy porn. Don’t worry about it, I’m just looking for those hilarious light up rings…nothing sexual about that, right?
Another reason that I like them that I don’t typically tell people—they’re big enough to fit my fingers. I have fat fingers. There’s nothing I can do about it—I’ve tried hand/finger work-outs, but really—-NO results. I’m doomed to be a size eighter. But to you other eight-and-aboves out there, the giant, plastic light up rings are PERFECT.
Anyway, about the rings, I can honestly say that I’ve worn them about everywhere, and am always happy I have it for some reason or another. The other night, I light it up at a concert so the people we were meeting could find us. Another night, I turned it on to light up my door so I could get the key in the damn lock.

Worthsies.

And the comments are also worthsies. It took me a few times out with the light up ring for me to come up with the appropriate response to the inevitable “That’s a big ring.” At first, I said thanks, but you know, I’m not sure that’s meant to be a compliment. It’s more of a truism. So now I just say “And it lights up!” That wins them over every time.

3 comments:

  1. WORD. As a size eighter, I appreciate and respect any ring that can fit on my finger without cutting off my circulation. I love those light up rings no matter where you get 'em. I also believe I purchased one for you when another ceased to function. God Bless Light-Up Rings.

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  2. i have also fed your light up ring addiction! and glitter ring..although that's not gonna help you find your friends at a concert or unlock your door! sorry about your fingers....that's the only place i am smaller than you. blargh.

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  3. i don't know who you are but i wish we were friends. i think i found your blog from a link on melissa tucker's, and i'm so glad i did.
    i live in arizona and i went to HS with mel (and marin mannies, also a plnu alum) and you are classy. my friends have awesome friends!

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