Wednesday, September 30, 2009

sweet memories

I'm so, so over work at this moment that I can barely breathe.

So I'm reliving this moment with you all. From Fall Travel last year...

How much do I use the word "so," right??? And, as you can see, even a year ago, I was predicting my early death. For good reason.

So I was driving on the 50 (Capitol City Freeway, HEY OH!), looooving
that my rental car has 21 preset buttons on the radio, when I stumbled
upon one of my ulta-favo songs of all time, Sexual Healing, just as it
started! I, of course, was singing along with all my might, and after
verse and chorus one, noticed that the car to my left in the carpool
lane was matching my speed. Obviously I looked over, and continued to
sing along (I could never compromise my own and the song's integrity by
NOT singing it when it comes on the radio, even when it could
potentially be extremely embarrassing). Good news--the person next to
me was singing along too. In fact, BETTER news, because the other
driver was, in the truest sense of the word, a thug--extra 30 pounds,
bandanna and everything. We shared a
knowing-through-the-sunglasses-look, which I interpreted to be "Yeah,
Marvin Gaye! Yeah!" It is this naivete that will likely lead to my
early and untimely death one day.
Anyway, I continued to drive for 30 more minutes to my current location,
It's a Grind in Rocklin, CA. When I parked and got out, a car slowly
drove by behind me. Guess who? That's right. My radio thug friend.
He'd either followed me for 30 minutes, through about 10 turns off the
freeway, or also wanted an It's a Grind.
I looked at him, my face probably conveyed the shock/panic that I felt,
and he drove away.

And back to 2009, I call this one "this guy is living my flipping life," because it's a HUGE goal of mine now to visit OF, call someone and have them see me on the camera.

Monday, September 28, 2009

coffee in bako

Frank told me that if Twitter is like mini-Facebook-status-updates, this blog was like maxi-Twitter.

In that trend...I am at an indie coffee shop in Bako, and here are the people in it with me:

--a guy in ill fitting khaki pants, a t-shirt, and really, really expensive Italian leather shoes that are too pointy for even me to appreciate
--an old cop in full uniform
--a biker (like a road bike...not a motorcycle) wearing full spandex, his helmet (still strapped) and ear buds, even though he's talking to...
--a guy completely covered in tattoos. Literally. Face and all.
--two guys wearing those heavy lifting belts that they wear at Costco and Home Depot (not sitting together, or connected at all, to my observation), one of whom is wearing it over a "1-800-radiator" t-shirt.
--a person whose gender is indecipherable.
--a guy wearing extremely dirty tan shorts, a Maravich jersey and Vans with laces, but no socks (who just started talking to Biker and Tattoo) who ordered a mocha "with extra love"

I'm just wearing a purple dress, typing away on work emails, and I'm the weird one. I keep catching people looking at me.


One of the lifting belt guys just waited until the barista was looking away, took all the newspapers from the bin, and bailed.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

another reason I will certainly die an early death

first of all:
since panini night, I've only purchased gasolina

not shopping is really boring.

So I'm pretty sure that I'm going to die a really early death because I make really poor choices...more often than I should...and more often than anyone who isn't a kid.

For example:
This one time, when I was in college on a debate trip, I was in a hotel room with my friend and teammate LeAnn, who was asleep, when someone knocked on the door. It was some tall guy...he asked to use our restroom...and for no real reason, I let him in.

That's straight out of...not even a horror movie. It couldn't be out of a horror movie, because no one would believe that anyone would actually let a stranger into her hotel room at 11 p.m.

Anyway, by the luck of the Irish (just kidding, I'm sure it was Jesus), I'm pretty sure this guy was just acting on a bet, because he used the restroom (during which I woke up LeAnn basically by saying "Soooo...I let someone into our hotel room..." and she was pretty pissed [for good reason]), then asked to sleep on our couch, at which point LeAnn made him leave (thanks again). No harm done...but I'm not really sure how.

I also often forget to check the peephole when people knock, I always give money to people on street corners (and legitimately think that they're buying food with it) and if you read earlier, I inadvertently propositioned the front desk guy in NorCal.

So tonight...I'm in beautiful Bakersfield, CA for a PL Info Night and a college fair, and I had the worst allergy moment ever. My poor coworker Buddy was setting up the Info Night, and I went to the hotel front desk to ask where the sundries shop to get any kind of allergy medicine. As it turns out, they didn't have a sundries shop, and referred me to the Costco across the street. Unfortunately, I didn't need 200 allergy tabs. So as I was walking away, an older employee named Salvador (name tag!) called me over to the counter where he was working, reached into his pocket and said "I've also had the allergies today...itchy have itchy eyes?" I did. "And the sneeze?" I DID have the sneeze! "You try these--I feel so much better." And he handed me two pills. In my defense, they were packaged, but the writing was sort of rubbed off of the back. It said Advil Cold and Sinus at one point...I think...not sure when. And with less than a thought, I took these two pills some stranger gave me.



As it turned out, I'm pretty sure they were totally legit Advil, because I feel about 90% better and got through the Info Night like a breeze.

Who takes medication from a stranger????

I am like a the worst way. My bad, my bad. I'm working on having these realizations when these things are happening, as opposed to several hours later.


I call this one "let's all wear our white shirts!"

Saturday, September 26, 2009


the isht I've bought:
-panini supplies.

Thanks to my great Aunt (she's really great, not great like once removed), Cousin and I now have a profesh panini maker. It's amazing based on looks alone. So we decided to break it in last night with some friends...and it's also amazing based on performance. I had a garlic hummus turkey tomato cheese, and I'm still thinking about it.

Thanks Mood. It was totally worth the panini supplies, which existed of turkey, cheese (havarti--where have you been all my life?), tomatoes and hummus (surprise).

So here's something I do that I don't tell everyone about: I watch Old Faithful's webcam. Not like "sometimes I click over to see what's going on at OF"...I always have it open on my computer, and sometimes, I stare at it through entire phone conversations. It's soothing. I don't know why.
But as if that weren't weird/creepy enough, I've recently started saving some of my favorite screen shots, giving them a title, and compiling them in a desktop folder exclusively for OF pictures.

I call this one "it's just so romantic here let's get married":

Friday, September 25, 2009


This is not going to be that awesome. Just needed to say some things IN CAPS.

FIRST OF ALL...I AM GETTING AN OWL TATTOO. I don't know when...I sure don't know where...but I'm getting it. AND THE REASONS ARE PLENTIFUL.

SECOND, I ACTUALLY LIKE THE SONG "WHO LET THE DOGS OUT." And not even as a sports anthem. I just like it. It's catchy.

Those things made receiving this in an email today THE BEST EVER.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

I think my student intern just made fun of me

Her: "Flowers--those are so pretty! Who are they from?"
Me: "Cat--she got them for me for helping her out at the event last week."
Her: "The last two times you've had flowers in here, they've been from your parents...that's cute..."

Me: Boom...roasted (in my mind)

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

here's something I hate

Those things that you have to type in the box when you want to do anything online.

Why, when I purchase concert tickets, post blog comments, buy something on eBay, or anything ever, do I have to type crazy words and codes? I got it when it was a verification that I wasn't a robot, and I had to type "c37ds" (are you sure you're not a robot? are you SURE?), but it was sort of hard to make out because it was in a crazy font or curved or something...but today, in order to sign up for the FREE Hilton Dining Points program (which is awesome), I had to type "rosencrans ethereal." Really? Also, if some robot wants to sign me up to get free points, do it. Don't make it jump through hoops!

And let's not robot out there is buying me stuff on my eBay account...and honestly, if it was, I'm sort of interested in what it would buy for me.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

the isht I bought and DIDN'T buy...

...well, I did buy it, but a long time ago.

T-shirts!!! Some of my favo purchases are t-shirts...sometimes for me, but mostly for gifts. And I got one for my brother and sister in law for Christmas, and since they don't read this, I can tell you that my brother's says "If your pants are on first, being a liar becomes less important." Come on...that's funny.

Here are some favos that I've purchased...two for me. Which two, you ask? Guess.

I'm home now, so here's the other isht I've purchased:
-groceries. I haven't made a full grocery trip since...I don't know...May? It was refreshing.
-two delicious Soup's not my was for a bday celebration!! Don't hate...I love that place so much. Baked potatoes fo-evah!
-pizza, for the premiere party of Community.

That's all, that's all, that's all.

Not surprisingly, it's all food related. I think that may be the only thing I love more than shopping.

So an interesting thing happened to me on Saturday. I was taking a nap, because I got in from the road at 9 a.m., and I was really tired, and I started awake for some reason (I'm sure it was for some crazy dream that I can't remember) and sat straight up. In doing so, my blanket hooked onto my nose ring. Said nose ring is bent three times, so it goes into my nose, then makes a V shape (v-shape ha)that lays against the inside of my nose. When the blanket hooked, it pulled the ring out two bends, so one little tug and that thing would've been out,leaving a hole in my nose. Another hole, I guess I should say. I was so half-asleep that I didn't know what to do, so I sat there for probably 15 seconds just going "aaahhhhoooowwwww" before I could think clearly enough to push that thing back in and unhook it. It hurt a little. Actually, more than a little...but not a lot.

That's it. That was the whole story.

My life's a lot more interesting when I'm on the road.

Friday, September 18, 2009

an open letter to my rental car GPS

Dear GPS--

I know there are Paneras closer to me than LA. I am looking at one right now. Stop telling me the closest one is in LA. And please...when I enter a destination, I will be upset every time that you tell me that I've arrived at my destination, when in fact, I have arrived at an empty field, or an abandoned warehouse. Also, your only job is to get me to the right place via streets and freeways. Ergo, the fact that you pronounce the word "boulevard" "bawugh-lee-vard" is not acceptable. Finally, the fact that I cannot make changes to my destination while moving is unrealistic. I do not know at what point I will want to eat lunch in my four hour car trip, and should not be expected to come to a complete stop on the freeway in order to see what restaurants are around me. Coming to a complete stop on the freeway will likely lead to my death, but I almost did it a few times, just to prove a point.

However, I do owe you and apology for hitting you against the dashboard all those times.


Shannon Hutchison

Thursday, September 17, 2009

super annoying high school visit that no one else will care about

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I just had to get this off my chest.

So I walked into this college center this morning to a (fat) lady (with a man's name), sitting at a desk. This ensues:

Me: "Hi I'm Shannon from Point Loma..." (hand extended)

Her: stares at me. This is the point in the traditional high school visit where a counselor usually greets me back, as they knew that I was coming because of our repeated email and phone contact, and the confirmation packet I sent.

Me: "Just here for my college visit...?" (hand still extended)

Her: "You don't want to shake my hand, I have bronchitis."

Me: "Oh...I'm sorry about that"

Her: "Am I expecting you?" (I don't know. Am I hungry? You tell me.)

Me: "Uh (and it takes a lot for me to start a sentence with UH), I'm not sure? You're on my schedule..."

Her: "Well you're not on mine."

Me: "Oh, I'm sorry about that. I may have gotten the wrong date." (no I did not.)

Her: "I don't have you on my calendar at all. But I have a lot of interested students, so can we schedule something?"

Me: (I know, because the list of students I sent you in my confirmation packet was pretty big) "I'm sorry--I don't have my calendar with me, but I will definitely call you ASAP." (I have no open spaces to come back to Rocklin)

Her: "Look at you...aren't you all dolled up? I guess black is the thing this Fall." (I can't tell, at this point, if she's trying to make up for me coming all the way over there, or if she just likes my dress).

Me: (yeah, black is pretty new, as far as business trends go) "Ha ha (fake fake), oh thanks, I sure do have a lot of black. Well let me leave you with some information about PLNU, and I'll be sure to reschedule with you soon!"
Her: "Ok, ok, thanks."


Terrific, see you then.

930 is perfect. Thanks so much—I’ll look forward to seeing you then!


Shannon Hutchison

Assistant Director of Undergraduate Admissions

Point Loma Nazarene University



How about 9:30? Will that work??

Thursday would be great—do you have any time in the morning?

Thanks again!


Shannon Hutchison

Assistant Director of Undergraduate Admissions

Point Loma Nazarene University



Monday doesn’t work but I can do Wed. or Thurs.

Good evening—

I’m looking forward to my fourth year on the road representing Point Loma Nazarene University in NorCal, and would love a chance to visit your students. I will be in your area on the morning of Monday, September 14. Do you happen to have any time on the calendar that day for a college visit?

I hope your summer has been great…I can barely believe it’s almost over.


Shannon Hutchison

Assistant Director of Undergraduate Admissions

Point Loma Nazarene University



Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I thought it was Thursday all day...

...and kept telling my coworkers that I'd see them tomorrow.

I won't.

It's only Wednesday.

The isht I bought today:
-a grocery store sando (my favorite!)
-Boston Market (those still exist)

So I think that the front desk guy thinks I'm trying to seduce him.

Night number three here--I demagnetized my hotel key. I'm surprised it took me that long--I ALWAYS mess up those things. So I tried the key, it did not work, I went back down and asked the night desk guy to re-mag, he asked my number, and fixed it. I went back up, tried it again, and it still did not work, so I went back down, and the guy re-fixed it, and said he'd come back up with me to try it, so I wouldn't have to come back down. That was nice. Anyway, it worked right away, andI looked like an idiot.

Next night, tried the key, did not work, went down, same guy working, so I just said "3-1-7." He just looked at me. I pushed my key toward him. He looked at me. I said "Oh sorry I demagnetized my key again...sorry..."

Pretty sure he thought that I was trying to invite him up.

Don't worry, tonight I completely forgot my key. He was working again. I told him what I'd done, and he said "well we'll just have to go up and get it..." Not what I was expecting, so I said "Oh, really? I thought you could just give me another one." He said "Oh, yeah, I can." And he did.

Pretty sure he was trying to invite himself up, and I'm PRETTY sure he thought he would be welcome.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Schmonday and Tueshday

I'm at the It's A Grind in Roseville (as is another rep, who I didn't recognize, but he said "pslam" when I walked in. Awesome) and there is a guy setting up a keyboard.
That's weird. It's four p.m...not really jam time.

Is there a jam time?

The isht I bought:
one amazing pastry
some noodles and chicken at Panda Express


So yesterday was a wild day of driving...I was on the road for eight hours and twenty minutes. Over that. Too bad everything up here is SO spread out. But that helped in the great un-shop of in the car is real hard.

Also, I passed a place (three times, actually) called "Wholey Ravioli," whose tagline is "Authentic Italian." I refuse to believe that any authentically Italian place would call itself Wholey Ravioli. At LEAST go with Holy! Wholey? What's the joke? You get whole raviolis? I sort of expect that.

Now there are two women crocheting a blanket together. Where I am I??

So I bought some sun-gs...and it was momentous. I think I have some sort of disorder. I've been driving around for two days with a headache because it's so damn bright outside, so in between high school four and five today, I put Nordstrom into the GPS so I could just buy some. I chose Nordstrom, mind you, because the BP in Nordstrom has $10 glasses, which was my newly imposed limit. However, my GPS took me to a Nordstrom $10 sun-gs...but I didn't have time to seek out a real store before my next appointment. I was nervous about going into the Rack, and for good reason. Here is the short list of things I almost bought:

--flat shoes, because I had to pee, which meant walking by the shoes, and I almost convinced myself that my feet were hurting and needed a break before the college fair. My feet do not hurt.
--a black long sleeved t-shirt, because it's almost getting cold up here and I don't have one
--two tank tops, because they were only $10 and I could use them on the road
--red nail polish, because I didn't bring one of the eleven bottles of red nail polish that I have at home, and I might want to paint my toes...I mean...I'm not spending money on pedicures, right?

Pause--Bananarama's Cruel Summer is on in the coffee shop, but the jam band (now a keyboard, guitar and some drum thing) is playing over it. COME ON.

--my perfume, because it was on sale, and I will run out of what I have within four months
-a Fall themed welcome mat, because it's for the house, not me
--shampoo, because my hair isn't reacting well to the soft water here...and somehow new shampoo would help that
--a scarf. No reason.

Seriously...I picked up each one of these items and mentally fought with the justification. Then, once I was done and looking only at sun-g's, I actually had this thought:

"well since I didn't spend any money on that other stuff, I can look at designer glasses!"


Anyway, I realized my ridiculous-ness, made fun of myself, and found the cheapest glasses there that I didn't hate. They weren't in my $10 limit, but they were relatively cost effective, and since my last ones cost .006 cents a day, I think I'm ok.

One last word: Sacramento radio is the flipping best. I like it even better than LA. I have my presets memorized for when I'm here, and they are:
-hip hop/top 2o station
-90s station
-oldies station
-70s and 80s station
-dance station
-another hip hop/top 20 station
-some college independent station

And all are amazing. Another purchase withheld is a cord for my iPod, because I forgot my FM transmitter, but I have successfully avoided any Best Buys (I always leave with seasons of something), so I am ONLY radio listening this trip. Cool...not easy with nine hours in the car...but impossible in SD, where radio is the worst.

College fair.

P.S. from a kid at a Christian high school this morning; "your school doesn't have drinking on campus? Over it!!!"

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Sunday...26 doughnuts.

The isht I bought since last night:
-a bottle of water (I hate airport water with the twisty know the kind)
-two fish tacos at 10 p.m.
-26 doughnuts
-a coffee box
-a coffee
-lunch at Panera

Extremely exciting so far. The Naz is taking care of me, and I can't lie...eating is my favorite part of Fall Travel.

And the doughnuts and coffee were for a bunch of high schoolers this morning...I didn't even eat one.

So I had an hour in the car this morning to get to Fairfield for a church fav youth group that on my of them, at least. Get this--they have four morning services--the first one at an elem school, then one across town (don't forget that town is Fairfield, so it's like 6 minutes away) at a warehouse, then another at the elem school, and another at the warehouse. And the students have separate classes that run opposite the services.

And I got to hear one of the other leaders speak, and he's cool. I guess he used to be in jail and was a big partier until he got churchy, and now he tries to keep these students out of trouble. One of the kids (he's 16) apparently got a neck tattoo a couple of weeks ago out of some guy's garage, and the speaker is so worried that this kid isn't going to get a job that he offered to pay for the kid to get the tattoo removed on his neck and relocated somewhere cover-up-able. Come on...that's the kind of church person I like.

It also led to me hearing this conversation:
Mike: "On your neck many of your friends have neck tattoos?"
Kid: "I don't guy I can think of"
Mike: "Is it gang related? Was he in jail?"
Kid: "No..."
Mike: "Are you sure? What's the tattoo?"
Kid: "Music notes"
Mike: (long pause) "Is he gay?"

Thank you for that.

Against my better judgment, I pulled into a new shopping center because I assumed it would have a Panera and I needed some wireless. There are so many good stores here, including a new DSW.

Pause for a second--I'm pretty sure I just ate someone else's lunch. I got a different soup than I wanted, but I went back and forth so maybe the girl was confused...but I'm pretty sure I ordered a turkey sando and I just ate a chicken sando. Oops.

Anyway, I'm here and about to read rather than walk around.

Things going on around me:
--a guy and a girl who aren't in a relationship (with each other) having some sort of accountability meeting in which they are sharing personal things about their respective relationships. So weird. And they're not even trying to keep it on the low. I almost wrote that I'm trying not to listen, but I'm not.
--a Julie and Julia book club meeting. Did I mention the two ladies I sat next to on the plane last night were also reading it? I think everyone is.
Why order two bread bowls if you aren't going too eat any of the bread?

Two important developments today:
--my sun-gs broke. The arm fell off. And not "the screw fell out"...the metal just broke. However, I worked it out, and those little guys cost me, per day since I got them, .006 cents.

--I put in new contacts this morning, and I had them in the wrong eyes until an hour ago. I just thought I was getting used to them. I wasn't. I almost crashed three times because I had my contacts in the wrong eyes.


Friday, September 11, 2009

The Isht I Buy

So after years of wildly abusing my own finances like a child, I've decided to try and be accountable.

I chose now because #1--I'm no longer even in my mid-20s, where financial irresponsibility is cute and cool, and #2--I'm about to head out on Fall Travel for work, which means recruiting for most people, and financial ruin for me. When I'm out there on the road all alone and all the work is done...I either eat or I shop. And I get full quickly.

The worst of it all is that shopping is so easily justifiable on Fall Travel. I'm not paying for gas, food...anything, really, so it seems totally fine to go to the mall and spend $100. Or $500. Let's be's usually closer to $500 buy the end of things. Maybe more...but I don't really know...because I don't keep track so I don't feel guilty.

Anyway, I'm leaving for Fall Travel tomorrow, and I have vowed, both personally and to my coworkers (and now to the world...or at least the world who Googles "isht"), that this is the year of no unnecessary purchase on the road. I figure since nothing else has worked, the fear of public humiliation for failing may keep me on track. Also, I hear this is how the morbidly obese lose weight--by writing down everything they eat, looking at it at night and crying and crying.

It is my goal to do the same...but not really...because I should have nothing to write down. Also, I just hate crying.

Here's why it's going to suck: because I'm on the road longer than I have been since 2004, and despite my shorter travel schedule, I have still managed to spend so much money.

Here are the broad strokes:

--Okay things: books and movies (theaters, not DVDs at the Best Buy...even that's too much for me to handle), because I have to have SOMETHING besides shopping to do.

--The one thing I actually need to buy on the road: a new pair of sun-g's. I think any of you can attest that my two year old $4.80 sun-g's are long past their prime...and I think one of the arms is on it's last leg (get it?), so I need a new pair before these are totally out of commission. You can probably also attest that I'm a wreck without sun-g's. I have sensitive eyes. Just look at my website picture for work...I think I'm actually crying. Actually, don't look at it. Anyway, I tried to buy these before travel, but my cap of $7 didn't get me anything. I'm hoping NorCal has more to offer my eyes.

--Nokay things--anything else. No work clothes, no Christmas presents (the easiest for me to justify), no "just needed these sandals because my feet were hurting".

I think those are all the rules. I figure that you're reading this, you know me already, so maybe just send me a message while I'm out that is like "get out of the mall!!!"...or something.

Fingers crossed.